It’s New Year’s Eve and I’ve had a couple of glasses of champagne so I’m feeling a bit nostalgic. Here are some thoughts according to some key stats for me in 2017:
That’s how much free time I’ve had since getting back from Australia and that’s why I’ve been so woefully poor at updating my blog. I remember reading ridiculous interviews with celebrities where they would say annoying things like there wasn’t enough time to eat, but now I understand it. Some days it is really hard to find time to eat and when I do I find I’m stuffing something in a huge hurry. Long gone are the days of a relaxing lunch or dinner! After surviving the return journey’s jet lag, we then had baby N’s christening the very next weekend.
Over here the christening is a VERY BIG DEAL and the babies don’t just get a little drop of water on the forehead, they get completely dunked in the water which can be somewhat traumatic for some babies. With this in mind I was completely stressed by the whole thing, but you know what, baby N was a star! He slept through the first half an hour of the ceremony in his godmother’s arms (parents are not allowed to touch the baby throughout the ceremony) and then when he was dunked in the water he did a bit of a complain but what more or less fine with it and was totally happy once he was bundled up in a bunch of towels. I loved him so much on this day! Then there was Christmas and then he got sick and then I got sick, so yeah sorry for not writing more. But onto the actual post…
17 July 2017 was the day baby N was born. One of the few advantages of an elective c-section with a cool doctor was that I was able to choose his birthday. I love the balance of his birthday being 17-07-17 (American friends it is 07-17-17 where you come from which is not quite as cool). It’s also David Hasselhoff’s birthday which did put me off somewhat but not enough to change it. We also got married on 23-03-13 so I have a thing for balanced numbers.
I finally did a count of all the injections I took in the making of baby N and 338 was the final total. This included the down-reg meds, the stims meds and the Clexane that I took throughout the entire pregnancy and for six weeks after his birth. Even this number is probably lower than the final total as it doesn’t include the full round of IVF I did previously or the meds I was given in hospital. I self-administered the injections myself and I swear if I’d not been so exhausted I would have thrown a party on the last day of the Clexane injections!
Baby N is now 5.5 months old and becoming even more lovely every day. He has a cheeky smile that he willingly gives out to loved ones and strangers alike (I think he’s a natural flirt) and I am regularly told by people that he is a calm and friendly baby. He is very communicative, only crying or complaining when he is hungry, tired or in pain. As someone who is highly strung I simply cannot believe I have managed to produce such a chilled out baby.
Baby N weighed 3.4kg at birth and now he is a huge 8.8kg! Not only that he has been above height since his birth (53cm) and now stands at around 70cm which is the height of an average 7 month old, but he’s only just turned 5 months. I have learned the hard way to buy clothes two sizes up as there have been way too many cute things he’s simply not been able to wear because he is extra tall for his age. I find that people ask to hold him and then give him back to me after 3 minutes because they’re tired from holding him. At least my arm muscles are pretty epically strong these days! But now it makes sense why people say babies grow so fast, because they really do. These past five months have been both epically long and incredibly short. I don’t know how to explain that better but it’s the truth. And I’ve got to say the last 6 weeks has been insane in the level of development that has happened. I can now see my baby turning into a little boy and even a little bit of personality appearing. It blows my mind!
The number of teeth baby N has. While it’s not freakishly uncommon for babies to get their first teeth at 5 months, they usually get them around 6-7 months old. When the tooth surprised me by poking its way through I was also delighted as it explained why my previously excellent sleeper had been so cranky and awful for the past few nights. I guess I had hoped everyone was exaggerating about how awful teething is, but now it seems they weren’t. The fun of parenthood is never-ending it seems.
That’s how many kilograms I gained when pregnant.
That’s how many kilograms I’ve lost since giving birth. The first 9 were not so hard to lose, the next 4 have been beastly and required heavy dieting (food is the key to weightless, folks). I still have 3kg to go but I’ve been too bothered with surviving life to try recently. They need to be gone quickly in the new year though. Even so, I can now fit into most of my pre-pregnancy clothes apart from my super skinny jeans and that is quite a good thing for my psychology.
The number of times I have questioned my ability to be a mother. Maybe it’s just me, but the level of self-doubt in this is huge. I constantly wonder if I’m doing things right or could be doing things better. Mothering is REALLY HARD!
Boxes of tissues (Kleenex for American friends) we have been through since July. Most of this can be attributed to crying (mainly me, again), but also baby reflux/vomit, baby drool, and then all the runny noses (baby + parents) caused by the various illnesses suffered. I know a few of you are expecting babies very soon – go buy lots of packs of tissues as I promise you that you’ll need them.
The number of foods baby N has rejected since starting solids two weeks ago. I have absolutely adored introducing “solid” food to baby N (puree barely counts as solids) as he seems to be super-keen to eat whatever I give him. While we have had success with pumpkin, sweet potato, carrot and pears, the real winners so far have been banana and apples. Two days ago he even ate a whole (albeit small sized) banana! I could not believe he managed to find a space for all of that, but he did! But oh my goodness the poo is something else!!
But in all of this what I cannot quantify is my gratitude that this New Year I am a mother. My journey was bumpy and difficult and I know how lucky I am to have my rainbow baby. So this New Year’s Eve I am home with my husband and my cats and my baby. This is by far the least glamorous NYE I have had in a very long time, but also the most peaceful and satisfying (also comfortable… hellooo tracksuit!). This time last year I was still in a world of anxiety about whether my embryo would continue to grow inside of me to be a healthy baby. The year before I had just lost our first baby. This year we are a family. Mummy, daddy, baby and 3 lovely cats. 3+3 and perfect.